Hey there! You’re listening to the Mighty Mommy with some quick and dirty tips for practical parenting.
Welcome to the new year. I hope you’ve all enjoyed the holidays. Listener Shannon wrote in to share a question that many parents might be interested in at this time of year:
Hi there. A dear friend just forwarded your website link to me after listening to me ponder about how to answer the imminent question "Mommy, are you Santa?" I'm sure a lot of people remember how it felt to realize Santa doesn't actually exist, and I'd love to find a way to soften the blow for my children when the time comes. If you would ask your audience how they handled the issue, I'd appreciate hearing their ideas.
Well, Shannon, I would also love to hear from other listeners to find out how they’ve handled this similar situation.
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My children are too young to start questioning the existence of Santa, but I do have a nephew who is struggling with his belief and we had a conversation about it just before Christmas this year. I’m sure that he’ll also be questioning the existence of other clandestine characters of his lifetime: the Easter Bunny, the Tooth Fairy, and for those who grew up in my household, the Great Pumpkin.
If you celebrate any or all of these characters, your kids are certain to come to the eventual realization that you may have had a hand in performing on the characters’ behalf. It’s a very personal decision for parents. You need to take into consideration your beliefs and your children’s personalities. How they handle information can play an important role in how you address the subject. I once had a friend tell me that she felt as though she was lying to her children by letting them believe in the existence of Santa Claus. There are also people I know who can vividly remember the moment at which they learned that Mom and Dad were responsible for filling the stockings on Christmas Eve. Every person is different and if I give you all a cut-and-dried answer for the “Are you Santa?” question, it would probably be the right answer for only a very tiny portion of the population.
As for my personal beliefs, I love Santa. I grew up in a versatile household where we had both a Christmas tree and a Menorah during the holidays. The fact that Santa came to visit us every year was amazing to me. I loved every minute of it. I still do. I also love that my children’s faces light up when they see Santa and have their pictures taken with him. They enjoy giving him their wish lists and they understand that he’s always watching and they need to behave. Yes, I’m admittedly guilty of using the “Santa is watching you” technique during the holidays to encourage better behavior from my kids.
When my daughter is older, I’m sure she’ll question the existence of Santa. She’s already asked me why Santa stores his wrapping paper in our garage. I told her that I’m helping him wrap presents since he has so many to deliver. She thinks I’m a very nice mommy for helping Santa this way. I’m sure this will progress into me helping Santa shop for presents and put them under the tree. I hosted a breakfast with Santa at my house this year for my kids’ friends. My older brother was kind enough to play Santa for us. His kids are at the questioning Santa age and were very excited to tell me that they think their dad would be the best Santa, since he’s one of his helpers every year, and they asked me if they could be his elves at the party.
Once a child starts really questioning the existence of Santa, I think deep down they already know the truth. If they are anything like me, then although they know the truth, they just choose to keep believing anyway, because that’s way more fun!
That’s it for now. I hope you’ve enjoyed the show.
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I would love to share your Santa stories. Please visit the comments section at the bottom of the show’s transcript, or you can e-mail the Mighty Mommy directly at mommy@qdnow.com or leave a voice message by calling 206-202-2185. Also, if you haven’t already done so, please take a moment to post a review at iTunes. I’d really appreciate it.
The Mighty Mommy’s Quick and Dirty Tips for Practical Parenting is part of the Quick and Dirty Tips network at quickanddirtytips.com. This week Grammar Girl is naming a pet peeve of the year so be sure to check out her podcast!
This is your friend the Mighty Mommy wishing you happy and fun parenting!